How to Survive a Mermaid Attack, 1527

British Library MS Royal 2 B VII, f. 97r

The mermayde is a dedely beste that bringeth a man gladly to dethe. Frome the navyll up she is lyke a woman with a dredfull face, longe slymye here a grete body & is lyke the egle in the nether parte, havinge fete and talentis to tear asonder suche as she geteth. Her tayl is scaled like a fisshe and she singeth a maner of swete song and therwith deceyveth many a gode mariner for whan they here it they fall on slepe commonly & than she commeth and draweth them out of the shippe and tereth them asonder... but the wyse maryners stoppe their eares whan they se her for whan she playth on the water all they be in fear & than they cast out an empty tonne to let her play with it tyll they be past her. This is specifyed of them that have sene it.  

Laurence Andrew, The Noble Lyfe and Natures of Man of Bestes, Serpentys, Fowles and Fisshes

The bad news is that the slimy-haired mermaid of dread wants to tear you asunder with her talons. The good news is that you can distract her with an empty barrel.

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10 Things Men Find Unattractive About Women

According to this article, these are the things men find unattractive about us women, written by a woman. You don’t need to read it because I break it all down, baby.

On Makeup:

Keep it natural. Men don’t want to go in for a kiss and come out looking like they just joined the circus. Remember, foundation is supposed to be invisible to others and blend in with your skin. Stay away from glittery or shimmering eye makeup and NEVER use clumpy mascara. Minimal makeup is sexier.

What Carolyn Says:

Yes, foundation is supposed to blend and clumpy mascara is no ones friend, but if I want to wear glitter and shimmery eye makeup, I’m gonna wear the fuck out of it. If I want to wear bright red lipstick and you have this fear of looking like a clown after kissing me? Honey, that’s your problem, not mine.

                                                     Thanks, Mom.

On Hair:

While a fancy hairstyle may be ok for a glamorous night out, men prefer natural-looking hair. It’s more attractive to look at and feels nicer to touch when it’s free of gels or sticky products.

What Carolyn Says:

Well, I have naturally curly hair so don’t fucking touch it. And when I have my Men Preferred Natural Looking Hair, I am 90 percent of the time, not a fan. It’s half curly, half frizzy, and pretty heinous to look at so I’m gonna go ahead and do my hair. I don’t like my hair all natural, I don’t give a shit if you do.

Obviously, you don’t have naturally curly hair.

On Shaving:

For the love of all that’s smooth — please shave. Men associate hair with testosterone and testicles so they don’t want to see it on a woman. Men like touching soft skin so say bye bye to the fuzz and make sure you use moisturizers and lotions to keep your skin smooth. It will send the message that you care about your hygiene.

What Carolyn Says:

I can’t stop laughing at this. I can’t. I shave dem pits pretty much every three days. I don’t like armpit hair. I’m a pretty sweaty person so having armpit hair makes me sweat more. But if you want to wave your armpit hair like you just don’t care, you do you. Other than that, I am 1000 percent too lazy to keep up with shaving. Shaving is annoying. Men don’t have to shave, why the fuck do I? Right, because society!

In the winter, I shave my legs maybe once every three months. Lady, I live in basically the tundra so I gotta keep warm. If you think I’m wearing anything but pants in the winter, you have another thing coming. In the summer, I shave my legs when I can start feeling the wind all up that bidniz. But because I’ve been #blessed with blonde hair, I don’t shave that often. When it comes to my body, I will go ahead and do what I please. AS EVERYONE SHOULD.

And just because I don’t wax every fucking part of my body everyday to resemble a toddler doesn’t mean I don’t care about my hygiene. Fuck you.

GROSS.

On Dental Hygiene:

Let’s face it ladies — men look at our mouths. Bad breath and discoloured teeth are unattractive to the opposite sex. Cut down on the coffee or red wine. Use whitening toothpaste or strips to brighten your smile and ALWAYS carry gum or breath helpers in your purse. You never know when that kiss may be coming.

What Carolyn Says:

I don’t drink coffee or red wine but if I did, I probably wouldn’t give it up just to find myself a suitable mate. I basically never have gum or breath helpers (...tic tacs?) in my purse. So if my guy kisses me and notices that my mouth wasn’t just dentist approved, will he be forever repulsed by me? Well if that’s the case, he is clearly way too high maintenance for me and can go suck a dick. DON’T FORGET THE BREATH MINTS.

My mouth is doing just fine, thanks.

On Alcohol:

Sure, a man likes to hang with a woman who knows how to have a good time but know when enough is enough. No man wants to see a woman puking in the bar bathroom or falling down on the dance floor.

What Carolyn Says:

If you peruse my Facebook page, you will find that this isn’t true. I’ve puked in every bar in Edmonton. I’ve fallen down on every dance floor in Edmonton. I still have a husband, PRAISE JESUS M I RITE?!

On Negativity:

Men like happy, positive women. So don’t complain about the lack of service at a restaurant or how long you had to wait in a line. Show your upbeat personality.

What Carolyn Says:

Um. No. But thanks. Imma ‘splain to you when I’m not happy about something. I am not a robot. I am a human person who complains about shit. And you’re going to hear about it. And guess what! I want to know what grinds your gears! Because humans! But I’m a woman so I guess I’ll just keep my goddamn mouth shout. I AM CURRENTLY SO UPBEAT, HAPPY, AND POSITIVE ABOUT STANDING OUTSIDE IN -40 DEGREE WEATHER BECAUSE WE ARE WAITING IN LINE TO GET INTO THIS PIECE OF SHIT CLUB. IS IT OKAY THAT MY HAIR IS DONE UP BY USING PRODUCT? PLEASE APPROVE THIS. I AM A WOMAN SO I PROBABLY NEED VALIDATION.

On Swearing:

Men like ladies with a little class so dropping the f-bomb in every sentence is a turn-off and does not show how sophisticated you really are.

What Carolyn Says:

Fuck you, you fucking fuck.

On Nagging:

No one wants to be told over and over again that they are doing something wrong. Choose your battles ladies. If they leave the toilet seat up, quietly put it down. If they don’t shave for a couple of days, deal with it. Let him hog the remote control once in awhile. Remember, there are probably things they don’t like about you too.

What Carolyn Says:

THEN TELL ME? This is how relationships work. By speaking to each other. But letting it all fester and fester will INEVITABLY lead to you blowing the fuck up over something so minuscule. Sure, you don’t have to nag, but if you AREN’T GETTING THE FUCKING PICTURE HOW IS THAT MY FUCKING PROBLEM.

On Being Needy:

Don’t ever drop your girlfriends and family for a man. Being too dependent on your man to make you happy is a turnoff. Expecting him to change to meet your needs is also very unattractive. They want to be loved for who they are.

What Carolyn Says:

Preach. Finally, something we agree on. OH WAIT, except that you contradicted EVERYTHING you just mentioned above. “Expecting him to change to meet your needs is also very unattractive.” But it’s okay that we have to change ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING about our personalities and daily grooming routines for him? Don’t wear too much makeup, don’t do your hair all fancy all the time, shave everything, cut out certain things to make your teeth nice, don’t wear too much perfume, don’t drink excessively, be a robot, don’t fucking swear, no nagging up in this bitch, don’t be needy. But ABOVE ALL ELSE, don’t forget to ~*~be yourself~*~.

If you want me to love my man just the way he is, then he can sure as fuck love me the way I am.

Source:huffingtonpost

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Haircuts that look gorgeous on older women

There are a lot of not-so-awesome changes that come with getting older. Wrinkles, a slower metabolism, and health problems don't exactly sound like things to look forward to. However, there's one department that doesn't have to change as you age. Regardless of your age, a gorgeous, vibrant haircut is your right as a strong, sexy woman. Don't think you have to kiss your long hair goodbye or give in to the gray hairs taking over. We talked with some of our favorite hairstylists about their tips for the most beautiful styles for their maturing clients.



Change it up

All of the stylists I spoke with agreed that the key to a great cut is being brave enough to try something new. One of the fastest ways to look older is keeping the same haircut for decades. As the times and styles change, don't be afraid to update your look. Hairstylist Jenna Mast has seen clients age themselves by hanging onto the same style for way too long. She recommends talking with your stylist about how to update your look.


Long bob

Our stylists could not stop raving about a clean, classic bob. It's simple, low maintenance, and always in style. According to celebrity stylist Mitch Stone, anyone can rock a long bob, regardless of your age. "A cut like this adds instant style and sexy sophistication," he told us. "You can't go wrong."

Hairstylist, Jenna Mast recommends a modern bob with long layers for her mature clients. "This will give you more movement and an updated look," she told The List. "There is nothing more dating and high maintenance than a stacked bob that needs to be cut every few weeks to keep it's shape."


Go for bangs

Celebrity stylist Mitch Stone recommends bangs for any age, but especially for his more mature clients. Bangs are always in style and can complement any face shape – but make sure your stylist understands your face shape first. Stone explains that bangs can immediately change the look of your face, so it gets a little dangerous if your stylist isn't experienced. "They (bangs) can make you look really young and sexy or make your nose or forehead look twice the size," he explains. "It's important to make sure you trust your hairstylist before going for it."

Stylist Ruth Roche often suggests her mature clients go for bangs that are long and wispy. "Have them trimmed often rather than cutting them shorter so they last longer," she told The List. "Fringes that are too short can look utilitarian and boring."


Don't be afraid of length

When it comes to our hairstyle, so many of us feel that we have to go short as we age. That's what we see all around us, so it can feel like the only option, but don't be afraid to hang on to some length. Jeff Stump, owner of Artkiteks salon explains, "Many people feel that they need to have short hair as they get older. This isn't always the case; it really depends on the texture of the hair and how their hair ages."

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The real reason we don't hear from Paula Abdul anymore

When Paula Abdul announced she was going on tour with New Kids on the Block and Boyz II Men in 2017, it was her first tour announcement in 25 years, according to Billboard. It doesn't seem entirely possible that it's been that long since we've seen Abdul on stage and performing, partially because she's been in the public eye as a judge on American Idol and The X Factor. But just what's been keeping her off the stage — and out of the recording studio — is more complicated than that.



The Corey Clark lawsuits

During American Idol's second season, contestant Corey Clark was booted from the show for failing to disclose his criminal record when he auditioned. When ET did their round-up of biggest show scandals, Clark made the list — but not for his elimination. Two years after he was dropped off the show, he came forward with the stunning revelation that he had been involved in a torrid affair with Paula Abdul. Clark claimed the fling had lasted for three months, and that she had not only paid him that kind of special attention, but she had given him guidance on how to take home the American Idol trophy, too.

Abdul's camp denied the entire thing, and denounced it as nothing more than lies. Independent counsel agreed, finding there was absolutely nothing to actually support the claims. Later, Clark would go on to sue others, including Fox, E! Entertainment and MTV for defamation, and filed a petition with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission stating that he was the victim of racial discrimination when he was disqualified from American Idol in the first place. The Hollywood Reporter got a hold of the official defamation complaint, which claimed that not only was the investigation done into his accusations a complete sham, but that he had been threatened with legal action to keep him from writing a book on his experiences. He went so far as to say that the entire episode had left him at "absolute rock bottom", and suicidal.

In 2014, RadarOnline reported that the $120 million lawsuit had been dismissed. No evidence of misconduct was found, there was nothing to support accusations that they had been intimately involved, and the court ruled that Clark had waited too long to file the suit anyway.

Tanning troubles

In 2014, Abdul was on the giving end of her own lawsuit against UVASUN West, Inc. According to documents acquired by The Hollywood Reporter, Abdul had suffered second- and third-degree burns after a tanning treatment was done wrong. The claim involved her purchase of a SlimStar infrared body wrap treatment, which left her with full-body burns that were particularly bad on her left leg.

The lawsuit also specified that in addition to her need to seek medical and surgical attention, she was left with permanent injuries and had suffered financial losses during the time she needed to recover. Just how long she was out of the public eye and recovering from her injuries isn't clear, but she also cited mental strain as part of the reason for the lawsuit.




The million-dollar driveway 

In 2009, Abdul was sued by Jill Kohl. According to Kohl, she fell in Abdul's driveway and was left not only in severe pain after the incident, but needing several back surgeries. The fall, which happened in 2007, happened during the filming of Abdul's reality show Hey Paula.

E! News reported on the end of the lawsuit, and that only came in February 2012. According to them, the parties' lawyers were able to broker a deal before the case went to trial, and the insurance companies were left to hand out the $900,000 settlement. In addition to that staggering number, Hey Paula's production company, Scott Sternberg Productions, kicked in an additional $100,000. It didn't go unnoticed that the announcement came only a day after Abdul tweeted, "Having a blast on @RoyalCaribbean Oasis of the Seas this week  ) so many cool things to do & plenty of sunshine!!"

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Exercises that will tone your abs in just one month

Whether it's a tropical summer vacation or a night at the club with your besties, there are certain occasions where you just want to show a little skin. And while six-pack abs are never a prerequisite for rocking a teeny bikini or trendy crop top, there's also nothing wrong with getting your fitness on, in preparation for putting your tummy on full display. "The most important part of toning the abs is understanding how to access them," certified Pilates, Yoga and Nutrition Instructor Claudia Matles, told me in an interview. "And truly, the journey of 'getting there' is where the benefits are!"

Here are eight exercises to help you start transforming your abs in just 30 days.



Pilates double leg stretch

Connecting the breath with the body through specific movements is key for refining the abdominal area, according to Matles. That's why one of her favorite Pilates moves for toning the midsection, is the double leg stretch.

Start from a seated position on your mat with your legs bent and your feet under your knees. Extend your right leg up to the sky, while extending your left arm straight forward at shoulder height. Then do the same with your left leg and right arm by pressing your navel to your spine. "Imagine a ping pong ball at the inner center of your lower belly," said Matles. "Inhale through the nose, into the ball, exhale [and] shrink the ball, making it tiny toward the center of your belly button by lifting the pelvic floor, pressing navel to spine, and wrapping ribs and hips to the mid line at the core. This is the breath/body connection throughout these exercises which is part of what we call Contrology," she explained.

Exhale and hold pose by scooping out lower belly and creating the curve in back to maintain. Inhale, then exhale and roll down on your lower back, maintaining the architecture of the chest lifted toward knees throughout the exercise. Repeat (do two sets of 10).

"This exercise tones the transverse abdominal muscle, rectus abdominal muscle and obliques," said Matles. "You can modify by keeping head and chest on mat."


Pilates crisscross

The Pilates crisscross is another favorite exercise for Matles as it's a great way to practice that breath-body connection.

Lie on your mat with a neutral spine (your pelvis should not be tucked or tilted) legs bent, feet under your knees. Interlace fingers behind your head, shoulders soft and down, with wide elbows. "Connect with the ping pong [ball]," said Matles. "Exhale, curl your upper body off the mat leading from the center of the chest by shrinking the ping pong [ball]."

Inhale. Then exhale and extend your right leg as you rotate the center of chest over to the right (try to keep the elbows wide as you bring the left armpit toward your right knee). Inhale and return to center. Exhale and extend the left leg and rotate the torso to the left. Repeat (do two sets of 10).

"This exercise tones your obliques, transverse abdominal muscles, and rectus abdominal muscle," Matles told me. "You can always place a yoga block the long way on the floor to rest your feet on, if you'd like to modify."


Russian twist

When it comes to working those stubborn oblique muscles, celebrity trainer Jason Rosell, who's also the creator of the popular Caliente Fitness workout series, loves the Russian twist.

Starting from a seated position, raise your feet two inches from the floor. Interlock your hands together in front, and begin shifting your body left to right, touching the ground each time for 20 seconds. Want to bump up the intensity? Try holding on to a weighted medicine ball throughout the exercise.

Fitness expert Dempsey Marks, who created the PreGame Fit wellness plan, is also a big fan of this exercise. "Russian Twist is a fantastic full-core exercise that engages all of your ab muscles including your rectus abdominis, internal obliques, and external obliques," he told me via email. "It also helps strengthen your lower back."


Caliente kicks

Similar to the traditional bicycle kick crunches with a twist, Rosell's signature Caliente kicks are a perfect for working both your upper and lower abs.

"Lay flat on ground and with both hands, grab one ankle," explained Rosell. "Then switch to [the] other ankle and repeat this motion on [the] opposite side for a total of 20 seconds, followed by a 10-second rest. Repeat the same exercise for another 20 seconds until

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Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez: Strange things about their relationship

Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez were two celebs no one saw getting together.

While Lopez frequently sings about passion, lust, and devotion, her personal love life hasn't been quite as melodic. A series of heartbreaks, broken engagements, and failed marriages would sour almost anyone to the mere thought of falling in love again. However, the dual-threat entertainer allowed cupid's arrow to strike her once again when she began a relationship with former New York Yankees baseball player Alex Rodriguez in February 2017.

Rodriguez confirmed he was smitten with Jenny from the block during a March 2017 appearance on The View. "We're having a great time. She's an amazing, amazing girl," he told the co-hosts of the daytime talk show.


The feeling is definitely mutual. As of this writing, the couple has taken their love bonanza to the airwaves and to various publications, continuously gushing about how infatuated they are with one another. But that doesn't mean we haven't noticed some peculiar details about their liaison. From Lopez using her music to send A-Rod messages to a cheating scandal that erupted just months after the pair went public with their romance, here are some of the strange things about Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez's relationship.



They go way back

The first time Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez came face to face, it wasn't love at first sight. In fact, the year was 2005, and Lopez was very much married to her then-husband, Latin crooner Marc Anthony, while Rodriguez was married to his then-wife, Cynthia Scurtis.

While attending a New York Yankees versus New York Mets game where Anthony was throwing out the first pitch, Lopez and Rodriguez met for the first time, and photographers even captured the exact moment when the destined lovers exchanged pleasantries with a friendly handshake. She and Anthony even posed for a picture with Rodriguez sandwiched in between them — awkward, though their relationship was strictly platonic at the time.

Twelve years later, the pair would go on their first real date. Lopez told Vanity Fair that she brought up their fated first meeting at the ballpark during their dinner conversation. "You don't have to say you remember if you don't," she told Rodriguez. "Shea Stadium, during a subway series," he responded.

This totally sounds like the makings of a blockbuster rom-com, doesn't it?


Hello, it's me, Jennifer

When Rodriguez was a guest on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, he was more than willing to take us for a walk down memory lane to discuss how he and Lopez reconnected after so many years.

The baseball icon told DeGeneres the it all started when he was out at lunch, and someone tapped him on the shoulder. "I turn around and I do not recognize this person and it's Jennifer, but she's dressed up as Harlee from Shades of Blue," he recalled of Lopez and her costume. "It took me about four or five seconds and she says 'It's Jennifer. It's Jennifer.' I go, 'Oh my god, Jennifer. You look so beautiful.'" Earth to Alex!

In his defense, Lopez told Vanity Fair that she was dressed like a "boy" that day, complete with an outfit consisting of Timberland boots, jeans, and a curly short hair 'do. So, we'll begrudgingly cut Rodriguez some slack.

After saying goodbye, he went home and contacted the songstress that same night and, as they say, the rest is history.


He was bold AF

For their first date, they met up at the Hotel Bel Air for dinner, but Rodriguez wasn't sure if it was a real date or just a casual meet-up between acquaintances. So he began blabbing to keep his nervousness at bay. "So he's talking, talking about his plans, about how he had just retired from baseball, about how he saw himself getting married again, all these things you wouldn't normally talk about on a first date," Lopez told Vanity Fair. "I don't know if he thought it was a date. I thought it was a date … He was nervous, and it was really cute."

It wasn't until later that evening when Lopez made an announcement that took Rodriguez by surprise. "She told me around the third or fourth inning that she was single," he said. "I had to get up and go re-adjust my thoughts."

After regaining his composure in the men's room, Rodriguez walked back to their table and shot Lopez a text that would change both of their lives. "It says… 'You look sexy AF,'" Lopez recalled. Um, yeah, we're sure his "thoughts" weren't the only things that needed to be re-adjusted at that exact moment, if you catch our drift.

That message, complete with a modern-day chat acronym, was the driving force that kicked their relationship up a notch. Some girls would've been completely turned off by such a brazen text message, but Lopez was obviously digging his bold digital flirtation.



She lets her songs do the talking

After teaming up with Skrillex and writer Poo Bear, Lopez was played "about 20 different songs." When she heard the words for the track "Us," her mind instantly thought of her beau. With lyrics such as, "Feelin' you go on and touch my love / Throwing it now, here you go, catch up / Could it be us?" she told Us Weekly, "When I heard this one I was like, 'Oh, this is relevant!' Alex and I were just getting to know each other. And I was like, 'Oh, my God, could this be? Could this be us?'"

Since things worked out in her favor, this entire story is a lot less cringey. But now that their relationship is headed in the right direction, Lopez dedicated a second track to the leading man in her life: the 2018 song "El Anillo," which translates to "the ring."

"We go to the studio and she says, 'I want you to read the paper,'" Rodriguez told told Jimmy Fallon about the first time he was made aware of the song. "And I go, 'Babe, it sounds like they're talking about us.' And she goes, 'Yeah, they made it for me.'"

Will Rodriguez get inspired by "El Anillo" and pop the question, or will he run for the hills? We'll find out soon enough.

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The Workout You Need to Do If You Sit All Day

Stretch and strengthen where you need it most.

It’s no surprise that sitting all day does some undesirable things to our bodies. Research has linkedexcessive sitting with an elevated risk for health conditions such as heart disease and type 2 diabetes. Of course that doesn’t mean you’ll get heart disease just because you have a desk job—but sitting isn’t doing your body any favors.

Sitting all day can also impact us physically. Sitting for long periods of time, especially with poor posture, makes your hip flexors tight, which causes the glutes (butt muscles) to lengthen to compensate. Over time, this compromises the ability of the gluteal muscles to activate properly, leading to a condition called gluteal amnesia, AKA dead butt syndrome. When your glutes can't do their job, other muscles in your body have to work harder, which ultimately can overwork them, leading to poor body alignment and aches. Tight hip flexors also make it harder for your pelvis to rotate properly—inhibited mobility in this area can cause compression and pain in the lower back, physical therapist Dan Giordano, D.P.T., C.S.C.S., and co-founder of Bespoke Treatments Physical Therapy in New York City, tells SELF.

If you spend most of your time sitting, there is some good news. While it is true that sitting for most of the day isn’t healthy, there are some ways you can help undo the damage, Noam Tamir, C.S.C.S., founder of TS Fitness in New York City, tells SELF. For starters, Tamir recommends standing up for at least 30 to 40 minutes a day. “A standing desk is also a good option as it will help you become more aware of your posture and engage your core muscles,” he says.

In addition, doing certain exercises when you’re off the clock can also make a huge difference, especially ones that focus on strengthening the posterior (back) part of your body—like your back, glutes, and hamstrings—while stretching the anterior (front) muscles such as your hip flexors, pelvis, and chest. This helps counteract the tightness that ensues when you're in a seated position, plus strengthens the muscles that we need for good posture (read: to be strong enough to simply sit upright and stand up straight).

We asked Tamir to put together a great workout that can help undo some of the negative effects of sitting all day. “These exercises are designed to strengthen the core, work the posterior muscles of the body, engage the legs, and help with proper pelvic and spinal alignment,” he says. “Together, these moves help to offset the imbalances associated with long periods of sitting.”

So what are you waiting for? Hop up off your butt and try this routine STAT.

Repeat the below circuit three times.

Dead Bug — 20 reps, alternating

“This exercise focuses on the stabilizer muscles of the core such as the transverse abdominus,” explains Tamir. “So much of posture starts with the core and this move gives you feedback from the floor” on how to use these muscles properly so your body is aligned.

• Lie on your back with your arms at shoulder level raised toward the ceiling. Bring your legs up into tabletop position (knees bent 90 degrees and stacked over your hips).
• Slowly extend your right leg out straight, while simultaneously dropping your left arm overhead. Keep both a few inches from the ground.
• Bring your arm and leg back to the starting position.
• Repeat on the other side, extending your left leg and your right arm. That's one rep. Continue alternating for 20 reps total.

Plank — 30 seconds

“Here you’re working the full body, especially the core muscles,” says Tamir. “It’s important to focus on having good pelvic alignment and not rounding the back," he notes. Planks can help to both strengthen the core and improve pelvic orientation.

• Get on all fours with your toes on the ground shoulder-width apart. Place your forearms flat on the floor in front of you with your elbows directly below your shoulders.
• Keep your core tight so your body is in a straight line from head to toe.
• Squeeze your thighs and butt.
• Keep your neck and spine in a comfortable, neutral position. (Tip: Try aiming your chin about six inches in front of your body.)
• Hold for 30 seconds.

 Single-Leg Bridges — 12 reps each leg

“Single-leg bridges are great to help engage the gluteus maximus (the largest glute muscle) plus the core and hamstrings,” says Tamir. Keep these bridges slow and controlled. Focus on really using your glutes to do the movement.

• Lie flat on your back. Bend your knees and place your feet flat on the floor about a foot or so away from your butt. Rest your arms at your sides on the floor.
• Lift your right leg in the air toward the ceiling, keeping your foot flexed.
• Push through your left foot to lift your glutes, hips, and back off the ground.
• Slowly lower back down, keeping your right leg in the air.
• Repeat for 12 reps, then switch legs

Kettlebell Deadlifts — 15 reps

"Deadlifts primarily work the glutes, hamstrings, core, lats, and traps,” says Tamir. Strengthening these posterior muscles helps to reverse the poor posture that tends to befall those of us who sit all day. “When performed correctly, without too much weight and keeping the back in a safe position, deadlifts are one of the most useful exercises to improve posture.”

• Stand with a kettlebell on the floor between your legs. (If you don't have a kettlebell, try one of these deadlift variations using dumbbells.)
• Keeping your back flat the entire time, hinge at your hips to push your butt back and bend slightly at the knees to pick up the kettlebell.
• Straighten your legs as you pull the kettlebell up to hip level, locking your hips out at top.
• Slowly lower the kettlebell back down to tap the floor, reversing the hip-hinge movement you used to pick up the kettlebell, then immediately repeat.
• Perform 15 reps.

Bent-Over Row — 15 reps each arm

“With this exercise, you’re working back and shoulder muscles including the rhomboids, traps, lats, and rear deltoids. You're even working the core because of the bent-over position,” explains Tamir. “A lot of posture flaws can be attributed to an imbalance of strength between the chest and the back, with the chest being more dominant. Rows can help balance that out.”

• Hold a dumbbell in your right hand. Stand with your feet shoulder-width apart. Bend your knees and hinge slightly at your hips so that your torso is leaning forward.
• Keeping your body in this position, row the dumbbell up to chest level, keeping your elbow toward your side.
• In a controlled motion, lower the dumbbell back down to the starting position.
• Repeat for 15 reps, then switch arms.

Goblet Squats — 15 reps

“This exercise primarily works the glutes, quads, hamstrings, and core muscles,” explains Tamir. “When sitting for long periods of time, our hips tend to get tight because they are in a shortened position. Doing squats gets us to sit back in our hips, past the range of motion that we’re used to when sitting at a desk."

• Stand with your feet slightly wider than hip-width apart. Holding a kettlebell with both hands at your chest (you can also use a dumbbell).
• Bend at your knees and hips to lower your butt toward the ground, as if you're sitting in a chair.
• Go as low as you can, then push through heels to stand back up. Make sure your knees don't go past your ankles.
• Repeat for 15 reps.

Our model, Dayzondra Gonzalez, is wearing Splits59 Arrow Tight (bandier.com, $108), Puma Yogini Live Bra (puma.com, $20), and Hoka One One Hupana shoes (hokaoneone.com, $115).

From:Self 

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